I have been in an artistic fever since coming back from these out-lands, wondering what my life has been worth this past year. I am haunted by the question; for what have I been working since the last time I crossed into the Playa and decided to stay put in LA for as long as I could? My yearly pilgrimage to Burning Man has always been paired with a somewhat shamanic intention. There I have my own ritual. Insert intention a. on the fire of the man, circling three times with all those techno-paganic hooligans who always circle the "wrong way" three times around the inferno. For manifestation, one is supposed to circle clockwise, and yet without fail, the circle always mills counter-clockwise. So, while the ones who think they know these things with such dogmatic superiority, they choose to mill through the crowd shouting out "you're all going the wrong way!" To which responses of confusion erupt on the faces of those who know naught of such magical workings.
Such is the way of humanity as we go against the tides of nature. Humans are always going against the current, saying it's wrong, trying to change it. But in my life, the way of a singular human mind is a drop in the ocean of consciousness whereas if a large group of people all intuitively move in one specific direction, that is representative of the flow of nature. So if one person sits in a crowd yelling "you're all going the wrong way!!!" And yet the crowd continues to go the "wrong way," is that just not indicative of what it's like to try and change the flow of a river's current? Is it not natural if a whole bunch of people intuitively feel that way is right? Or are we just lemmings? So why do we even bother to go against it? In my mind, if everyone chooses to make a counter clockwise circle around the man, then the magic we all intuitively create together is that of destruction. We unintentionally create magical ripples of change. And so I always throw scrolls of things I want to delete from my life into that fire. So I go with the flow of nature as much as I can.
This year I decided that I am not really on the right path anymore. A part of me has been circling counter clockwise, and the other part of me is yelling "you're going the wrong way!!!" And so I have stopped and taken myself off line. Hit the old proverbial "Reboot" button. In a sense I have been breaking down old patterns that don't serve me anymore. And now I have achieved a state of emptiness that I have not felt before. But this is a new kind of emptiness. This is an emptiness that is ready to be filled as opposed to the emptiness I have been experiencing that just wants to be empty. I have been able to successfully cut off all the fat I don't need anymore, and that voice who likes to yell out "Hey dip shit! Wrong way!" has silenced itself. Instead I know now what I want to manifest, and so I am ready to circle clockwise. If I decide to just plain ol' circle clockwise, and lovingly accept that everyone else is going counter-clockwise until they're good and ready to come along with me... I can just be content to go my own way without feeling like everyone else is a lemming. They are just following their collective instinct. Whether that is right or wrong still remains to be seen.
